got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
She has never blacked out. I have tried to get her to so many times. Apparently it's a lot harder than we make it out to be.
i will be the first lesbian to ever fail women's studies.
Poking every semi-decent guy on Facebook in the hopes that one of them will want to hook up with me tonight. So far all i've accomplished is 5 new poke wars which i will most certainly continue after this weekend.
I clipped one of my extensions in his hair to give him a rat tail. What is my life?
our friendships a beautiful delicate flower...that has been crushed by peni
He specifically said I couldn't post the picture of him passed out naked except for a strategically placed washcloth. Where's the fun in that?
YOU'RE MARRIED. TO OTHER PEOPLE.
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. It doesn't matter what it's about. Last text was about a homeless dude
bought a large fruitopia from McDonalds at 7:45 this morning. Spilled it on the ground. Cried. THAT hungover.
I woke up with her finger in my vag. Let's just say that I'm one horny inquisitive drunk.
so we just got back from swapping peoples patio furniture around to different patios. some people might like unexpected change. others might regret living on the ground floor.
I am pants-free in the living room. This is liberating.
This Asian instant coffee I found in ur kitchen is like crack. Who knew I could feel my heart beating in my asshole after one cup of this happiness.
My parents heard a lamp fall and crash and the dogs were barking like crazy so my mom got up to check. she found you peeing in a corner by the tv. And you kept shhhing her.
so i may or may not have just had sex on the stage of the lecture hall....
Randomize
