would it be rude to tell a homeless man that he should sell the lebron jersey and brand new nikes he's wearing if he's really that hungry
I have no idea what happened after 2 AM. I woke up on my bike, in my bed, with a deep thigh bruise.
She tried to kill herself by taking a whole packet of panadol. I mean HELLO THAT'S ME EVERY SUNDAY MORNING.
I thought your voice was coming from the walls. I've never been so relieved to find you naked in a closet
Drinking vodka straight out of a beer bottle because I don't want to be judged. Not my best idea and not my worst.
The sigh of relief when u realize none of your drunk texts will result in permanent damage
i could've stared at her spine forever man..she was so deep, and she made a drink out of vodka and organic mangoo shit. i will find her and present that goddess with some fucking gummies
you're no longer allowed out of my sight at parties
Dude it's huge. I don't usually like looking at those things, but you're kind of forced to stare that horse in the face.
I'm like an air traffic controller of women. It's a very similar job. Well spaced and gentle landings are good. When they meet, it's bad. Explosions bad. Dying screaming burning children bad.
Question. There's no better feeling than clean shaven balls. Do girls get that too?
2015 is a year for health and mental stability and alas we are not yet there so yolo
Damn it. Can't order pizza. Can't do the hot tub. No one to invite over for loud, kinky sex. What's the point of being here alone?!
Ugh. He got her for secret santa. Idk what to get. Idk what she's into.
... other people's boyfriends.
This is like a walk of shame down memory lane.
As she came, she moaned Roll Tide. I kid you not.
Randomize
