didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
you know you go to a catholic school when you are rollin a joint with matthew 14:1-12
You were spooning my trash can and I had to crumble cookies on the floor by your face to get you to eat
On the bright side, I hit her with the door on the way in
He and I are basically the same person, except he has a glorious penis and I have glorious breasts.
thats because you have standards... and i have a thing for guys that give me free drugs.
I have a strict rule of what enters my vajay. It's either sparkly, or human. Anything else and I draw the line. Standards.
She can't meet us until 830...there's no hope for our sobriety at that hour
my paper on vitamins just turned into a 2 hour tangent google search on what i should buy to best cure a hangover. I need to stop getting high before homework
It turned from Netflix and chill to cringeworthy YouTube videos and chill. At least he's honest.
Then his buddy called and said "my car broke down, I need a ride. If I'm not home by midnight they'll extend my house arrest." And I knew it was time to leave.
You're going to replace me with a robot made of heating blankets and a vibrator?
Is there such thing as dick sucking teeth guards?
We're sort of like brothers. Except with more sexual tension. And we don't look alike. Or are related.
So we're not much like brothers really.
He literally asked permission to hit on me
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