Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
So chef boyardee smells exactly the same after you throw it up
i literally discovered the exact same thing last week. i had the lasagna one
ravioli
He just refered to Steak and Shake as "a good place for couples". I will definitely not be shacking tonight.
We left the bar, went to a sex shop, bought penis shotglasses, went back to the bar and insisted that the bartender used them.
I feel like i got beat with a pillowcase full of tequila shots.
so far we have 6 big wheels and 10 boxes of wine for the tour de franzia. team drunkslut is favored to win the yellow jersey.
At least you got some premium homework time. Still drinking vodka from a coffee cup?
I switched to water. When the numbers get blurry you are no longer being productive.
Whoever owns the butter that i always steal out of the office fridge definitely put THC butter in there this time. Shit just got real.
Tried to drunkenly hop a fence with my cast on to get away from the cops but ended up falling over a bench.. how do I explain those bruises to my parents?
god. I was just thinkin about the fact that there was a time in our life when we didn't drink.
But in defense of this shit summer we've had, I totally perfected my shotgunning skills. I have achieved my summer goal.
I am laying in your bed and just found a bottle of wine under your pillow ...should have married you...
I used my iced coffee to ice the bump on my head from last night
I hope you have your own chainsaw cause I didn’t buy one for you. It was a gross oversight on my part
Why is there an inflatable flamingo in the backseat of my car?
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