So now everyone thinks I don't know what a condom is
This fat girl in front of me just got on the bus to go 2 blocks. Do you think she ever wonders why shes fat?
Don't judge me. He's really sexy for a 17 year old. We made nasty in the womens bathroom at the beach. Don't worry. I wore sandals in there.
None of that is ok.
You're surprisingly coherent for someone who thinks her couch is breathing.
And with me just getting pulled over and you maxing your card out on tennis balls I don't know if we can afford it
hot boxing the bathroom at chili's. where the fuck are you, it's too big of a box for just one person.
I'm not going to pass up the opportunity to be half naked and covered in glitter without facing judgement or legal prosecution. I'll be there.
ETSY JUST SENT ME AN EMAIL WITH THE SUBJECT "SUMER ROMANCE" I'M BEYOND FUCKING DONE
He was only in jail for 4 hours before he was someone's prison wife
I didn't wake up drunk this year...I must be getting soft
Yeah I guess quad-fisting Miller Lites just isn't as effective as it used to be
And I got shut down by a ginger. It was a weird night
I like it here so far, only people are a lot less accepting of my terrible decisions and it's cramping my style
Since moving to the suburbs, all I do is fuck my ex and watch cartoons. It's not so bad.
dude, next time you say lets go on an adventure, tell me if there are going to be psychotrophics involved before hand.
Cockblock successful. That's for pouring nacho cheese on my flatscreen, asshole.
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