Who was more unwelcome: The two of us at the party last night, or Kimmy Gibler at the Tanner residence?
She kept saying "I'm going to hell" the entire time we were fucking. I really wasn't sure what to do... so I agreed with her.
That was definitely the right answer.
I'm gonna vom. In the dentist chair. Who makes a dentist appt for July fucking 5th.
That glade motion activator thing keeps going off every time we pass the bong. I don't know what I'm getting high off right now.
I just want you to know that i just realized your the only friend i dont feel fat around.
Your wedding's just one more day in my life I can't wear sweat pants.
For her birthday she wants to, " try something different with our butts a funnel and a bottle of whiskey"
You haven't had the true md experience until you've had your crotch grabbed by a drunk stripper with a snaggle tooth in front of your coworkers.
I invented the best game. It's called "what touched my exposed nutsack?" It can range from pillows to toothbrushes
I swear that when we jog in the morning I can hear it slap between his thighs
I got about 15 snapchats from you with your hand saying "you want cheese sticks" or something like that and one of some weird looking weed
the reputation of my dick game is on the line. You're killing the team, here, G
Let's celebrate that I used a condom
He said he loved me more than Kel loves orange soda
the result of growing up in the '90's
Step one: We finally agreed on an au pair that we both wanna fuck.
Randomize
