if he's not good at sex i should be allowed to have sex with someone who is. that's a totally legit statement i think
We're learning about the color wheel. Hello college.
He told me I had nice tits + they have a great shape. + then proceeded to flatten my boob + show me what the gross tits he's seen look like.
It was just a reflex. BOOM I kicked her in the face
Totally uneven. One tiny pussy lip that almost didn't exist and one giant lip that unfurled liked 5 different times half way down her leg and could have been used to hoist the mainsail on a pirate ship.
You disappeared for 10 minutes. Then came back with nothing but your boxers and a life jacket on to tell us we were all screwed when the flood came and you would be the only survivor.
I gather from Facebook you got drunk last night and took semi naked pictures of yourself?
Chose not to courtesy flush and the CEO huffed the result. I feel powerful.
dude he's still passed out in my bathtub. and his dick is half way in a 40 bottle... i really hope he was just trying to piss in it
THEY SELL PREFROZEN MARGARITAS AND THEY COME WTH A STRAW. MY PRIORITIES ARE IN ORDER
like I licked Molly off a boys palm last night at a bar I think its ok to eat chicken once a week
Are you trying to say I've made an emotionally well rounded transformation similar to the Grinch?
We were driving past a farm when he screamed at me to stop the car, then he jumped out and tried to ride a cow.
Was that before, or after strip tac toe.....
in the past 2 days I've ruined2-3 lives, made 2 men quit the bar, started a Wednesdays only affair, ended it, ruined that engagement and had my tires slashed by a jealous bouncer. please stop letting me out....
Randomize