yeah well you didnt even puke from the alcohol. we cut you off and went to huck finn's and told you that the "irish cream" coffee creamers had baileys in it, so you shot down like eight of them and puked all over the floor. it was great. we cheered you on and everything
Most guys don't get turned on by "skinny, gangly legged girl with glasses laying in bed touching herself." You better start working on your diction if you're gonna keep up the sexting.
some how when im high sleep beats hunger...its like how paper beats rock it doesnt make any fucking sense but it still happens
Who has a video camera? i want to look back on this one day and say OH thats why i spent 2 years in jail
i saw a stretcher and literally ran around for 10 minutes telling people it wasnt for me
you know its bad when everytime i put on a shirt i think of who i hooked up with in it
I just sent a friend request to someone saying that i was the girl he shared a fifth of jager with last week. Thats something special. He better accept.
She made me go down the fire escape when her mom came for breakfast.
sitting on my lesbian neighbors couch, sexting, & eating a burrito.. that single
Porch rule of tonight: when you sing, you must use "something" as a microphone. The person to use the most "creative" object gets the door prize...so far Stephie is winning with Jennifer's dog.
yesterday you declined a drink because you "didn't want to be responsible for it" ok kanye...
My housemates are judging me because I'm high at 8am and making Spongebob shaped Mac and Cheese
They know nothing, John Stoned.
He left for work so I drank pickle juice from his fridge
I knew it was on when all she had to say about the handcuffs was 'I really hope these adjust tighter!'
i don't like interrupting booty calls. thats just rude.
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