I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
FUCK TREES I CLIMB BUOYS MOTHERFUCKER
STOP listening to that song
winter break is gonna be like a weird mixture of rehab fat camp and holiday cheer.
my mind is a poorly written porno when i'm drunk.
I was carrying him baywatch style into my place because he passed out.
I have a way to get him back. you're going to have to take one for the team and make a visit to the health department. you in?
If I don't at least start a parade that spirals into drunken riots then I'm calling it a fail of a birthday
Not a clue. But I did find out that his penis has a British accent.
Literally lying on a futon being hand fed bacon
Fuck you.
Hey, if I can't get it and you're still alive, can you get the glass out of my foot? Happy Sunday.
Relaxed was like phase 1 of this phase 7 high
My manager just held my hair while I threw up in a dumpster. New low.
Obviously last night's theme was "Let's Make Bad Life Choices"
I've been getting a lot of emails from patron lately for being a great customer. Is that awesome, or should I start thinking about seeking help?
I'm sorry you had to knock him out on your birthday. But that also means I won the bet that you'd hit someone so you owe me 40. dollars
Randomize