I just put a condom on my dildo so i wouldng get another uti....most depresIng moment of.my LIFE
how do you tell a roommate that having sex on your bottom bunk is not appropriate even if she has a top bunk that's hard to climb to?
she's in the bathroom. spitting in the trashcan. not throwing up. just spitting and singing bad romance by lady gaga.
thatta girl
if i remember New Year's Eve then there is something seriously wrong.
I wore a leash I'll tell you about it later I had a fantastic time
Nobody has seen her in 3 days. Should we call the cops or hope this is just another drunk Carmen San Diego game she's playing?
Boys DO look like their dicks. Its like dogs.
It's hot as dicks out. Lets get drunk on the roof and make pterodactyl sounds at people.
I know but we're going to blackout city so it'll probably be warm there
Asking me to suck on my nipples isn't going to make me less mad at you.
Stop leaving buckets of wine at my house.
Also I feel like death. But like. In a good way
I just choked eating whip cream from the can, and peed a little because I was coughing so hard. How am I still single.
How was it?
Incredible. Everyone in the world should be having the kind of sex I've been having.
He should write a pamphlet or something...
Getting knocked up by someone with a good job and a big dick, okay. I can handle that. Getting knocked up by someone who sells dildos for a living and has a tiny dick, SOMEBODY is losing a pair of balls.
Randomize
