Well i just wrestled a cop... p.s. i won
you turned your livingroom into a bong?
i think im having one of those erections lasting four or more hours
Ryan Howard.... the only guy who struck out more than me this weekend
After that we used the in-room hotel coffee pot to warm up some queso. it was brilliant
Just mindlessly walked into the mens bathroom. My vagina has now become its own independent being, looking for penises. I'm just along for the ride.
Staying in I think. Boyfriend has domesticated me. I'm making eggs naked right now. Also really high.
oh my god. the driver of our party bus just said "no drugs unless you're sharin," my confidence in him is not high at the moment
I pretty much threw up on him while he slept, I had one task today which was to wash the sheets that I threw up on and I turned them pink. I would leave me if I could
Your list of "good ideas" thumbtacked to the lampshade last night consisted of nothing but "tampon-pen" with a note indicating that girls could then always have something to write with, even naked.
Just traded the drive-through guy at BK a Dos Equis for a Hershey pie before noon... win?
I got shot at last night. Lesson about married chicks: learned.
We don't have paper towels so I microwaved a spinach/egg sandwich thingy wrapped in toilet paper. Toilet paper. so that's how my day started.
Can you come get me? I woke up in the woods behind the Super 8. I have pizza.
I have a hickey in my new work ID photo.....
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