Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
I'm youtube-ing children's choirs. Am I adorable? Or am I a child predator?
Predator. Straight up.
I just egged your windshield and it froze on contact. Have fun with that.
Youre on making sure I dont black out around fat chicks duty
Hey wes just called me saying he was asleep outside by the pond at my apt complex
She literally just puked and rallied AT HER OWN WEDDING. Welcome to White Trash town, America.
Ive waited a long time for a girl with prescriptions like yours.
You insisted we help some homeless guy put up posters for his missing pet alligator so we left you there because they were really just Chinese takeout menus.
No. I'm too high for this. I gotta focus my mind for my future Hooter's interview
I'm not sure if it was the 11 shots or your naturally vibrant personality but I recall you being quite noisy that evening
Wait I'm all alone with a guy and his turtle
I just fell off a roof. So I'm kinda chillin for a minute.
Come get me...at gazebo by side entrance....im passed out in a bush...this is a Bar A bouncer texting for your buddy
I don't know why this person would ask for help. It sounds pretty OK to me. Also, I'd steal those bagpipes.
He was eating me out on a picnic table on the frame lake trail and right after I came, a group of hikers walked around the corner. Stood up just in time
And this is one of the many reasons why you need a car.
Randomize
