On a side note I can sing drakes “best I ever had” so good you’d think I was on degrassi.
You have to stop making references to your extense knowledge of 13 year old girl television programming for me to believe you aren’t homo. The Bravo line-up was one thing, but seriously
New pre-game routine....wal-mart bathrooms...quality beers for free...hallelujah
you tried to tell me that ice cream had no calories because they were "frozen"
This needs to stop. I just vacuumed the wall. Adderall is a double edged sword.
yeah, its right past the deli mart where i showed my right tit for mozzarella sticks.
Drag queen told me that I have the cheek bones to do drag. That's supposed to boost my moral.
I just sneezed and it made my entire body ache. Hungover is an understatement
She tackled him mid-puke while the other two were cutting up a $60 dildo with a kitchen knife and putting the pieces in a Corona bottle.
I want to just live in between your butt cheeks.
No one wanted to hang out so vodka and I are hanging out
Please don't explain what tea bagging is to my mother.
You'll never fully grasp an awkward walk of shame until you run into his mom while you're trying to sneak out. Then to make matters worse you have to ask her to mover car because it's blocking you in.
and I lost my effing shirt.
How hot? Like... how many hemsworths?
Look at us. Planning our business meeting. Including snacks like shrooms & trail mix.
You're swimming in an imaginary pool of pudding. What do you think?
Randomize
