So I got a little fucked up on the punch, and made out with the family friend. Which is apparently morally reprehensible. I don't get that.
i saw like six of her guido cousins in the jersey shore trailer alone. her family is having a dinner party for the premiere tonight.
His dick was poking my bladder. That big...
I stayed at the bar and helped clean up cause I was told I'd get free shots. Didn't happen.
MOMMMMMMMMMMAYYY! YOU BIRFED ME TODAYY. IM CELEBRTIN ON YUR BEHAF! THANK YOU!!!!!
I always hoped you would never inherit this side of my personality. Hon, trust me, you're a mess. Go to bed...alone. xoxoxo
Just come here and visit. Enjoy the deliciousness of me being legal. Just don't think, and come here right meow. meow meow meow.
Judge me...This apron fits PERFECTLY when I have no clothes on
Who said I was judging? More like congratulating.
Fortunately for myself I'm twice as smart and half as drunk as everyone else. All things considered I'm leaving here three-to-five times richer than when I arrived.
you're expensive. Idk about all this. What happened to free make outs?
Sobriety and mild self-respect
We started pregaming at 8. It's 11, and her only 11:11 wish is to be sober. It's hard to not love her.
I AM CRUING IT IS 93:2 AM AND I AM CYGIN INT BED
I am disappointed by everyone's lack of ability to dance on a stripper pole:(
All i remember his him yelling yahtzee while pouring beer down her shirt .
This means I've slept with 2 ppl that live in vans...my life is complete
Keywords: shitstorm, police, jail.
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