If it makes you feel any better I'm plucking my mustahce and drinking. Alone.
im sober playing flip cup. its like cheating.
Apparently shes in the bathroom puking but eating a pot roast she found in the fridge at the same time.
We watched 'the mighty ducks' last night and took shots every time someone quacked. I woke up this morning wearing a nothing but a hockey jersey laying next to him on the floor. He was wearing a goalie mask. I really wish I knew what happened.
I just ate a cashew that looked EXACTLY like your dick.
I'm currently blowing up the downstairs bathroom at work. I wish I could foursquare this.
Taking Gomer to the ER. He tore something trying to stretch his nutsack enough to put his balls in his own ass. I need new friends.
I just blew my weed a kiss
Just streaked campus for a bottle of patron...maybe you're right...I might have a drinking problem...
So last night was the first of "I got cut off before I walked in the bar".
I want you more than I want a burrito.
I'm not as filling.
well i blew him then my wife blew him, so im guessing we'll be seeing him around, yeah
because he's a firefighter, wouldn't sleeping with him be like saying thank you to the community?
he's figured out my code; what are you doing = I haven't found a better dick yet
dude me and this dog are gonna go bond oon the tramplene with stromboli... i think everyone is staring at me... being this high is SO stressful
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