if i can run in heels then i can drive
my night went downhill once I lost my bikershorts. EAWSSSSYY ACCESS
I've slept with so many tools that you'd think my pussy was Home Depot.
Goodbye hot boy in my geo class...goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend. you have been the one, you have been the reason I came to claassss
You weren't lying about those ceramics students giving the best hand jobs.
i just had to hear from a third party that he came inside of me
Well, I plan on starting the night dressed as little red riding hood. Then I plan on finishing the night dressed as a shit show in a red cape.
i'm going to invent a mini fridge that can hang from faucets so i don't have to get out of the bathtub anymore for a cold beer. its a million dollar idea
I think it's awesome that you're getting shower sex advice from a Mormon.
As my straight cousin I need you to answer a question. Are the Astros a baseball team, and if so, are they good? This is flirting related and time-sensitive.
The internet is out at West Chester so I'm masturbating using my imagination. What is this, the fucking dark ages?
I'm graduating college in 4 days. I already miss the bad decisions
There's always a silver lining when massive voluptuous tits are involved
It was probably bad to sleep with someone just to pet his dog right?
Nobody on Tinder wants to give you a Blumpkin.
Randomize
