You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
She made me repeat after her: "I take responsibility for what I put in my own mouth."
i've never been more proud of someone than i was when he told me he got his first blowjob at age 13...from two chicks
No see this is how It goes: guys will fuck virgin girls. But girls don't really want to fuck virgin guys. So you're good have no fear.
There are paw prints all over my ceiling.
do you find it slutty that the last person I had sex with is also the person who sings my ringtone ?
max decided it would be a good idea to run down the hall and smack down the exit sign. now we are sitting in the emergency room, and he is wearing the sign as a bracelet
it was fucking weird. cops showed up but they appreciated our 3 story bong. and then some girl tried to steal our cheese and butter
I would totally lead with that as a line.'So, I was on Legends of the Hidden temple as a kid.. Your place or mine?'
You're the horniest male I have ever encountered
Makes it sound like you're a scientist documenting your discoveries. I warned you.
He just made my one night stand pancakes for breakfast. And I thought living with my ex was going to be weird.
Allow me to explain. Triple D is a surprise. It's like if you're expecting to fight one person, then you get ambushed by more. Except it's a good ambush, because it's boobs, not death.
Officially the best daughter ever. I just restocked my parents alcohol that I stole last night AND ADDED TO IT
hey, cheif big dick, where the fuck are my panties.
Yoooooo, the fat magician married the chick I dumped a beer on after I got pissed he was flirting with her in front of me
Randomize
