i think of them as a grilled chicken salad and a fried chicken biscuit. obviously Amy is better for me, but when i'm eating her all i can think about is how much better the blonde must taste.
counting down the days left of school on my birth control packet.
hey im home...im not sure how this mcdonalds got here but whatever im gonna eat it anyway.
So I woke up in a strange bed with a note taped to my arm giving me directions back to my brothers apartment.
That's unfortunate. Distance can be a stoner's greatest enemy.
You make it sound like a battle for Middle Earth.
Its official the day you get back into town we are having a going away to jail party for me. My last wish before prison is to shit faced drunk with you, get into a fist fight, and then cuddle up and fall asleep. Just like old times <3
They switched jackets and you didn't notice. You made out with both of them and had no idea
I thought he was being really sweet and protective when he pulled me away from the guy i was hooking up with, but turns out he just wanted me to get chicken nuggets with him...
You were running around waving the flier in everyone's face and thats how we ended up in a church eating free breakfast tacos at 3 am
Not sure if you're still doing the whole "sleeping with only one person" thing but if you're not we should sleep together when I get back in town tonight.
He showed up to a booty call with 2 tea bags, but no condom...
I found one of those wine glass confetti bits in my ass crack.
I just spent so much time grooming my landing strip and like, sex isn't even on the agenda tonight.
Just for once I'd like my first interaction with a new GP to not be an obvious sex injury.
now acid just makes me think of crab ragoon
Randomize
