she was so not down for the gang bang
I walked up to her and said hello and wanted to ask her if she had fun last night... she asked me if we had met before.
Was going to watch Bolt. Fucked a stranger instead. Details later.
So you didn't like Bolt?
Whatever, you were 10 deep and there was a hot tub. No judgment.
Grad practice is like a live scrapbook of my drunken sexual encounters
Wash that dress asap. You laid down on the kitchen floor and tried to sweep the floor with your body.
Like. I probably should fuck him. I owe him for breaking his thumb.
I woke up in a sink... Not like curled up on top of it though. I was standing, bent over, face first. IN THE DAMN SINK.
yeah but think of how much more hungover we'd be if we didn't steal those cookies
you ate the make a wish sign. Like actually chewed on it. It was our solution to going outside when the cops were there
Did my married ex-boyfriend really tell me that he prays for me? Fucking Judas
Yeah he told me he wanted a serious relationship, but he's posting pictures of his dick on Kik.
Stop thinking about me and go on your date... at least I got the glitter off your face first.
my near death experience doubled as my sexual awakening
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
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