Yes give me all the cream and he's gone
so... i had sex tonight
with a midget
nicccce tits for a little person
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
Corey Haim died. 80's me is so sad
when she said she's going upstairs to put her "play clothes" on, I knew either she was a pervert or a kindergarten teacher. Either way, I wasn't going to leave. She's a pervert by the way.
We ran out of toilet paper the last week, so we just took showers to pee
keep an eye on me. i'm afraid that after a few more drinks i'll ask to borrow his wheelchair.
I would have to gauge my vagina to make it fit.
It's that moment where you find out the girl you've been dating for 6 months is a mob daughter. Post breakup.
You motherfucker. I just had an MRI with a penny under my boob.
New Mean Girls drinking game: Everytime someone says Africa or Math, chug.
We may not see eye-to-eye on much, but I'm definitely willing to let you see eye-to-vagina again.
I am thinking about buying a decorative chest for all our sex stuff....
Was just told that I slept on the counter using a loaf of bread as a pillow. Clearly my life is going well.
It's okay to admit that you're into redheads.
Randomize
