Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
Is it wrong to want to cut a hole in the Tigger suit so I can molest you while I wear it?
The make-up sex just reminded me why we broke up in the first place.
Is it sanitary to roast marshmallows over a cigarette lighter?
So.. My internet got red-flagged at work because i did a search on "midigit strippers las vegas" This may be hard to explain...
i'm sober ask me anything about the civil war
What's the rule on cocaine before dinner?
Its 11 o'clock somewhere
It says a lot about how well I know you when I can understand messages of yours that say things like "sauteed Jesus."
If you didn't damage your room so much from fucking so hard we would have got more of our security deposit back
I resent that
Mom brought home a 36 pack of Smirnoff and was all "ring any bells?" and then winked. I'm scared. What does she know?
Yeah, surprised you made it on time this morning. Remarkable, considering 2 hours ago you were pretending to be talking window curtains.
Took three klonopin and turned all my jeans into jorts. I miss you
I'll just go on tinder. Seeking strong male to help take apart ikea furniture and move. I'll touch your dick.
So I got a text from him saying "jacking off...thinking of you" I think I'm going to get a restraining order
Even after hearing me fuck his friend twice in one night, he still follows me around like a puppy.
Randomize
