I will be home in 10 min. Dont be beating off on the couch
enter at your own risk
i now know from two sources i am better at making out and giving head than she is. and not by a little either.
I made friends with a raccoon. I pet it. Like I was Pocahontas.
i just masturbated in footie pajamas. there's no judgement here.
Heard in class today that they replaced our carpet in last years apartment because they couldn't get the smell out, dude we smoked way to much pot last year.
He wanted to have sex in a church because he has keys to it from court-ordered community service. WHAT IS STANDARDS?
We used a snorkel as a funnel. Can you say desperate?
Is selling savings bonds for acid money something a normal person does?
You're an independent woman who is defined by her own actions and not by whether or not you have a man. You also have great tits.
One of my favorite March activities is cropdusting people while wearing a kilt.
After you punched me you ran away and it took an hour to find you... On the wrong floor... Sitting alone saying "it doesnt make sense"
Pillow talk?
can't do it. no eye contact either.
Where have you been all my life
Dude. why do I feel like I am cheating on you every time I do shrooms?
Oh god, I forgot we had sex to Elton John
But seriously like how many girls do you know that will do that on the first date?
One?
ONE! And it was was glorious!
Randomize
