Richard, I just read on your Twitter account that you have enjoyed a, "Much needed post birthday smoothie..."...A bit revealing, no?
I just woke up in the coolest sweatsuit i have ever seen..it has cory's name on the tag...do we know a cory?
wait, do i give off the impression that i DON'T want girls to show me their boobs if i video chat with them?
Transgendered man at work dawning a slutty batman costume. I hate Halloween
You just kept saying "they don't make cigarettes for squirrels. Yet."
Helped an old lady on crutches throw away her mcdonalds, carried her stuff to the car and helped her get in...most productive cinco de mayo hands down
If you don't come out tonight, who's going to wake us up in the morning because they're fucking in the middle of the room where everyones sleeping?
That would warm my breasts.
In this context breast is a metaphor for soul.
Yeah thats cool. We can play the alphabet game while doing bumps of coke in the back of his volswagon
I'm getting the lip of my vagina pierced & you expect ME to be the voice of reason?
CONGRATULATIONS! You have won: pictures of my nipples!
FUCK YOU AND YOUR WEAK ASS EYEBROWS
We both fell asleep mid-handjob and he continued to call it "handjob halftime".
idk what happened last night but i just wokeup with nothing on but a necklace...what is this, the fucking titanic?
God help them if any millennials are in the vicinity. Rent is too high and we no longer fear death
Randomize
