There's some strange man with hair that keeps talking to us. I'm scared.
This is how horror movies start. Going to bar with strange hair guy. He's paying. Bad idea?
Ditched hair man. Got free cab ride to market. Want food. I win.
He shouted my World of Warcraft name while we were having sex, and he was sober.
I just tried to light a cigarette with a tube of lipstick. If I had stayed in girl scouts maybe I could've made that happen.
How far into the semester do we have to be before it's ok to get drunk in between classes again?
positive spin of the day: since my nose is blocked from allergies cleaning the puke this morning was much easier
just got booed by the entire restaurant.
Driving around Panama at 7 am looking for an open liquor store..
The last text I sent him was about nachos. Frankly, if he can't respond positively to that he can fuck off...
And I can feel feelings now and they hurt
you guys just sat there and simultaneously smoked bowls staring at each other... it was like a bowl off or something.
I just want to sit my fat ass down at McDonald's and never leave
New drinking game idea: Take a shot for every republican you see on facebook bitching about the ruling.
Things that happen while I poop: I start dating someone
How I know that I'm single: when I get a save the date for a wedding & I read "& guest" my first thought was does my bottle of Jack Daniels count.
My alcoholism is old enough to drink.
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