So my mouth tastes like dick. Does that explain how our talk went?
I swear I have "I love assholes" written on my forehead with ink that only guys can see.
Anywhere you can eat green eggs and ham, you can have sex.
those are the first brownies ive had since i was 13 that didnt have weed in them.
Dude, she introduced me to her best friend form Russia and she was a 10. Her other Russian friend was even hotter. How did communism fail?
just got the results back. i love his dick even more now i know its clean
Dude, didn't you know? Its balls out wednesday.
Call me when you get back form court. Hopefully its not later than noon. Just remember..win or lose we still booze.
You think posting ushers "let it burn" video on his fb page is in bad taste? haha
Well, it's hard to say. Last night he puked a perfect circle around him on the floor, and then sat in it insisting it would protect him from the smoke monster. He's was still there last time I checked.
Highlight of the night: paying my cell phone bill at the bar... I need to get laid.
I have no idea. I think this is what happens when people take drugs in the middle of the day
Dude... I had a dream that I was getting high for the first time. I got to experience my weedginity again. It was glorious.
Keep in mind this was 2012... YOLO was a very new concept.
I feel like everything in my life has been preparing me for my future sex robot experience
You’re so close!!!
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