The bird has been looking kind of ugly lately...gotta look nice to fly with the hawk ya know?
can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
i feel like a thai whore the morning after the navy left.
i feel like someone uncorked me like a wine bottle and pulled a living animal outta my arse.
the only plus side is that now I'll be able to tell my son not to trust the condoms that his college gives away..........
I don't know what part of vegas I'm in but its definately the wrong part
having my hair in braids makes puking so easy. i am being an indian every halloween
if you are still a virgin by winter break we are throwing an aztec themed sacrifice the virgin party
and let me tell you something, handcuffs are surprisingly uncomfortable when they arent being used in a sexual manner
First highlight of the semester: campus safety caught me peeing in the dirt parking lot by kappa. Then as they were about to write me up, they recognized me, laughed, and left.
By the way, do you realize that you asked me how much you could get for your eggs last night. And once you learned the price said that you had plenty to share.
I mean with a sentence like that I knew I would be cumming
I feel like sleeping with foreign people is a long term investment. It's like a time share. Now when I go to London I have a place to stay.
Dennis picked up a 50 year old woman. Then he and Dan got in a fight and jumped out of the limo. No one knows what happened to them.
Randomize
