Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
Why do all fat girls have "that smell"?
The world needs more lipstick lesbians, if anything.
It was awkward until we both realized our obsessions with harry potter and sangrias were the same. Now were in love.
You need tk get a life and stop texting me about fictional characters. I don't give a shit.
There's a lady carrying her kids toy animals in a crown royal bag. Mom of the year.
I mostly enjoyed dancing with him because his boner was scratching my bug bites.
Oh they knew you from a bachelorette party! You were the pole?
Ohhh shit yeah that was me. Fuck. I hate myself when I do that.
My liver and my bank account can't afford another all nighter. Help.
Told my prof I have mono so that he won't judge me when I show up hungover and looking like shit to class every day.
Just skip
Please. i have SOME standards
Woke up in a bathtub with both of my legs broken. How was your night?
I'm high. The text bubbles floating do no justice to the underwater experiences
I have already put on my inside pants.
Just asphyxiate me and toss my corpse in the Ocean. It'll be easier than whatever the next four or eight years will bring.
And by "I love him" I mean "I want his tongue down my throat.
Next time you decide to post pictures of yourself in your underwear on facebook, please don't tag me as your bulge.. My mom spent 10 minutes looking for me in that picture. I had to tell her I was hiding.
Randomize
