i just google imaged poop.
i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
You know the guy who poops at a party and then leaves and you go in, do your business, and come out and there are girls outside that think you pooped and no one talks to you? I'm the guy who poops before you go in, because I'm in a relationship and I hate you.
You didn't want to have sex last night because you said your grandpa just died and you didn't want him watching..
its a nice change of pace not blacking out and actually remembering getting laid
I think I have internal bruising from those poses we were doing last night. My own ribs hurt me. I don't understand.
I'm fucked up. I can't drink anymore. We stole a cat.
We are going all out this weekend. My liver is already smiling.
you don't know what its like to have your bartender tell you that you owe him beer money infront of your mother at 3pm on a tuesday
First thought today, I need a ventriloquist dummy that looks like me. This week's project has been determined.
he puked in the sink and didnt turn off the water before he passed out on the bathroom floor. its been 2 hrs and we finally noticed that the whole fucking house is flooded. to hell with this birthday party
He thought he was ordering for the whole party so when he came back with thirty burritos and four of us were left, he wasn't happy
At least you didn't sleep with Ashley's uncle.
We fucked while The Odyssey played in the background. Homer would be proud.
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
Randomize
