Sexting assembly today. Fuck yes
we were pretty classy up until the second keg
We had sex on a ferris wheel in canada, our relationship will never be the same
The goblet must only be used for good. And vodka. And anything t-pain would be proud of.
I just watched a guy pee from a second floor window onto the line of 100 people waiting to get in.
We made a bong out of a plastic football. I can honestly say we make a good team.
I don't know if this whole sobriety thing is going to work out... It's only been 3 days and I want to chug vodka
drunk freshman in the bathroom puking keeps saying "i'm a peasant" over and over
Some poor guy found you passed out in a bathroom stall. Again with your dick out. Looks like you got to rage after all.
Wait. You NEVER used a Dizzy Doodler pen as a vibrator?!?
I'm developing all these feelings it's disgusting.
Instead of saying hi she asked if she could touch your dick through your ski bib and NOW I understand why you wore it to the bars
He tried to throw up into a beer bottle. It was a complete disaster. Vomit went everywhere. It put the Bellagio's fountain to shame.
I woke up on the damn lawn again...it's not even summer yet
I’m making a jello mold of my penis
Will it be as disappointing as your actual penis?
Randomize
