I want to make a zoo with you.
Oh come on. There's no way I was the only female choir student taking shots in the back room.
I called for backup and had two guys carry him to the shower. The bigger guy offered to wash his hair.
I mean...he was throwing up for almost 3 consecutive hours. I don't think there's a chance in hell that would have tasted even close to tolerable.
corona bottle fell out of my backpack and broke in the middle of my physics midterm. yay me.
The last text I sent him was about nachos. Frankly, if he can't respond positively to that he can fuck off...
Sometimes you get drunk and fall out of a car. I never said it was glamorous.
I think they're German
Just say lederhosen and see what happens
Im glad the only reason we got out of bed today was to get Halloween candy on sale.
I'm sure it's not the worst thing to ever come out of my ass
I'm not THAT invested in seeing you to an orgasm
It kind if looked like a strap-on dressed up for Halloween.
Yeah, I've hit on priests at bars, too. Such a shame, there are a lot of hot men out there who've devoted themselves and their glorious genitalia to the Lord -_-
Is "You've never made me cum." an acceptable breakup line?
On a scale of 1 to 10 how good of an idea would it be to pregame at the airport right now
Ten
Randomize
