I think a homeless person took a bath in my mouth while I was sleeping :(
They wont let us in. Theyve some sort of no Daft Punk costume rule
Level of drunkenness: just now when I sat down on the toilet, I had to double check to make sure I wasn't sitting on somebody's lap.
oh god was she eating orange peels again
the only good thing about him lasting five minutes was that nobody thinks i had sex with him or that im a slut because we were only in the bathroom for five minutes
The pride tent is doing free lube tastings. There is also a mechanical bull.
Haha I will however wear glass and and draw a lightning bolt scar if you want to have sex that way, and that can be the only time you can call me Harry.
I'm alone drinking at the bar and the titanic theme song is on. This won't end well.
Tell him to dress up like Shaggy and kidnap him then bring him to me. We can pretend. Imaagination.
I should make a collage of all the pictures of me caught doing slutty things
He made me twerk for scrambled eggs... I regret nothing
Ive done some fucked up shit, but last night was the first I have Poured milk on anothers mans face in the shower.
You're right. I woke up today with my ugly sweater still on and no pants. I'd say it was a successful night.
It's pretty self explanatory. You tried to have sex on the hood of a car in front of everyone
i'm 99% sure they had an orgy while i was passed out
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