This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
using no condom is gross. my vagina has a dress code.
I can't wait to see her breast feed this thing
Sorry I didn't wanna double team his sister. Having whiskey dick and watching you get laid didn't sound appealing
if we dont hook up this weekend, im doing both his roommates
she told me to hold the wheel while she hung out the sunroof and cursed the old lady behind us out.
I don't think i can handle my uncle say again that kid rock is a true musician....
He just texted me from the outside of the hospital. He called the fat broad in the bar mrs snuffleupagus about 60 times and she broke a bottle of blackberry brandy over his head.
You almost hooked up with 200lb woman in her mid-forties, because you were convinced she was adele. Your drinking problem is officially out of control.
i love him because he let me keep my UGGS on while we had sex
So topless strobe light beer pong turned into me rugby tackling a bitch to the ground.my tits will never forgive me for sacrificing their majesticness for responsibility
My boobs love her too. She makes them feel important even though they're small
I'd risk everything I own for 10 min naked with her, 2 would be sex and the rest me crying like a little girl.
Long story short if you're going to get drunk on a sailboat at night leave your phone in the car.
just threw up in a gas staton parking lot in front of a father and son. stared them in the eyes and finished like a boss
Randomize
