You dirty dirty liar I like the way you twitter
if you don't open the door right now liz is going to get pregnant
he invited me to an all week drinking party at his house. apparently he knows the key to my heart is booze shaped.
youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
His internet history had "Disney Porn" on it.
and apparently i was drunk enough to follow up with "I'd let me touch your boobs" ... not my best line.
You coming bye my yot got egg sweet carilne vodklaa
we bribed her with croutons and jello shots.
Liquid roulette time! Black Mystery Cups are filled with either ipecac, whiskey, or NyQuil. Let's have fun
got fuckng wasted at spring training, got a lap dance at le girls, got a burrito at filibertos, and still made it to my 5 o'clock eco class wearing a bikini top....I love Arizona State University
Hahaha wear something that says i'm here to party but wont go farther then a handjob.
I send him pictures of my tits whenever I feel like he's paying too much attention to his girlfriend.
His new place is a molesden. Like a hole in the ground. It's frightening how oddly private it is.
It rubs the lotion on it's foreskin...
i think the realest test of our friendship is how hot your sister looks right now
she stuffed her marc jacobs purse full of cereal
classy
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