No, I'm not okay. Girls are wearing BUMPITS here.
i'm starting to get really nervous about the relationship i have with my cat
he fucked me so hard my future children felt it
no where in the syllabus does it say "no alcoholic beverages allowed".
my mom just poured a water bottle of wine to take my dog on a walk...
So I guess I passed out face first on the ground while trying to grill last night
If I wanted to fuck someone, I'd go for John. I'm meeting Bryan cuz I wanna get to know him better. And eventually fuck him. But not this Tuesday.
I wore a firefighters hat and drank beer all night. They had to drive me home after breaking the beer pong table, they told me I was welcome back tonight though...
I just sent Brandon a snapchat where I wasn't wearing a shirt but had a rooster drawn on my boobs that said "cock block" and laughed for 10 minutes I have problems don't judge me
sexting foreigners is the best. they respond with silly things like "love that tits"
Naked. naked and bneed help.
I love you, and I just washed my hair in my work sink with handsoap.
I still can't believe a guy pooped in my backyard
I am eating croutons on my bathroom floor. Are you happy?!
My butthole is tingling. Must be the grapefruit juice
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