Can i not drive my cunt home
I'm so high, I forgot to harvest my farmville crops....noooooooo.
Worst stoner tragedy.
I just typed 14 shots of Smirnoff into my calorie count toolbar. Then typed pole dancing 1.5hrs into the calorie burner search. Should break even.
so apparently i worked out for over an hour last night. drinking is the only way i will ever get anything done
It looks alright. The blow up doll is in the microwave, and she has forks in her ass
he said good things come in small packages and I decided to hook up with someone else
You're alright. You just passed out while we were having sex. Then I'm pretty sure you peed. So I went home.
You'd think the neighbors would be used to grown men coming into my house drunk at 230 am.
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
Props to you. You took the bet seriously. Making out with her for an hour right after she spewed
His parents came home, and now I'm hiding in a closet; awaiting death at dawn.
You are always hiding in a closet though??
raging hangover at work with a lunchable dreaming of the sex ill never have. my life is perfect.
It was a crazy night: tears were shed, blood was spewed, and bottles were emptied.
There is a baby in my apartment. What the fuck happened last night?
There's wax on my nightstand, my sheets look like Christmas, and my vagina feels like it got into a fight. All signs of a good night
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