and my herpes radar will keep us safe
it always starts out as a suggestion then three hours later I have cum in my eye.
I don't remember which guy I met at the bar is coming to pick me up. It will be like my birthday surprise.
she just gave me a present from you... on a stripper pole. in front of the whole club. :)
WHY ISNT THIS A PICTURE MESSAGE
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
I haven't had nearly enough lesbian experiences to fully commit to this relationship.
i didnt think "maybe you should take over" was a good thing to say when i couldnt get it up
No she stopped screaming. Now she's eating popcorn. Off a plate. With a spoon.
In a min. With a stripper at the hospital. Business. Not pleasure.
I transported a midget tonight. He got beat up by another, midgetier midget. Is it bad that this is what makes me feel compassion after 15 years of being a paramedic?
Midgetier?
Smaller, yet meaner.
You know we had a good night last night when today I opened up my Google Translate application and the language is set to Persian and the phrase to translate is "I want you to suck my dick".
She's high and running across rooftops. Yes we're going to end up in A&E again.
He took my virginity but also my remaining pizza. i dont know how to feel right now.
in a meeting in my bathtub while predrinkin for tonight. technology.
Anyone who does not consider cereal and wine as a balanced breakfast needs to leave immediately.
Randomize
