I gave my ex the dutch oven last night. How was your night?
i crushed up some extenze and put them in his protein powder - should make for an interesting gym experience
She laid down on my bed and played "I want you to want me" on my laptop. subtle.
just bought a 30 and sold it for $2 a can to some dumb ass high school kids. now lets buy two and get really drunk
Just found 2 diff. colored pubes in my underwear..new record.
I like one night stands...theyre like crushes for big kids
I don't see why you're so upset, it's not like you were wearing pants either.
I fucked a 6'7 Danish man. In the ocean. At 5am. Greetings from Florida!
Is it possible to dent your eyeball? And how do you "accidentally" go cosmic bowling?
No, the responsible one does not yell out "lets go to iHop" at 5 in the morning to a bunch of drunk people with munchies.
If 26 stitches didn't sober her up, nothing will.
I told my doctor about us having twin chlamydia
So random question. Does beer act the same as other alcohol disinfectants?
Xanax and cookies, it's good to be home
you started putting peanut butter on your pubes.
Randomize
