If I ever start a band I'm gonna name it "Nancy Reagan's Vagina"
Just remembered throwing your phone at your face in a half-drunk stupor the other morning when your alarm went off. Thought I should apologize.
Omg calling you in 10 to update you on who I peed on last night
Weer fine. went to buiy cigxs, but hes theonly one waering shoes. He caem out wti chicke fingers instead. whatecer, there th 8 dollar kind.
Being high is an amazing excuse. I was using him for the potential of a beret, come on. I'd do that sober.
I feel like everytime I call him he's either fucking or getting into trouble. It's really disturbing that he presses the answer button and then proceeds to fuck her harder.
I woke up to him yelling "WHO SLEEPS WITH A BEER IN THEIR HAND?!?" this of course, startled me awake and made me spill the aforementioned beer. So I guess the a answer is- not this girl, not anymore. Asshole
Hungover. Have to fix everything I've broken. I'm gonna be very late.
I saw this news story about two naked Satanists being arrested so I thought I should ask if you need bail money or pants
He's easy on the eyes, light on his feet, and rough in bed...what more could a girl ask for in a rebound?
He showed up at my front door with Plan B and a rose...
The dog just shocked himself by peeing on Christmas lights, should I have saw that coming?
we both turned hook ups into relationships we are crushing this thing called life right now.
I just saw a guy in a zippo shirt buy 2 gallons of fire starter fluid and then proceed to smoke a cigarette. I feel like hes got some big plans for his tuesday.
I'm going to go ahead and refrain from sexting you in an airport that is currently at a "level orange" security threat.
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