Spider just rapelled from her vag rethinking online dating.
i told the bartender last night that if the palace saloon made a calendar he would be every month.
The amount of 12yr olds downtown right now boggles the mind. I can thank taylor swift for a glimpse at my future 3rd wife.
I can do it, this is my punishment and I will accept it, plus id like to see the look on peoples faces when I throw up on them
The entire defensive line took care if me when I passed out. One of them even held my hair when I puked and the other carried me upstairs to bed. God I love football so much more now
i ordered a pipe on amazon, and under recommended items, it gave me a top hat. it knows me better than my parents.
Well I think it's fate. Considering march is my fave month because it's my birthday and st. Patrick's day. And his name is Patrick. I'm sleeping with him all through march. No question.
Dude, she's the greatest salesman alive. she convinced chelsea to buy a box of Cheerios for $20. She can find your dick some willing pussy.
and i think wearing the clothes from last night are out of the question...was there mud wrestling there? because i look like a participated..with a cat.
You humped everything and cried in an uber.
I'm having a funeral for my vibrator. Please be there. I need your dick for support.
Well waking up naked, covered in Chex mix is not how I planned to start my Wednesday if that's what you're getting at.
Is it bad I use my AA meeting to hookup with guys?
We had sex and then ordered pizza after. This relationship is looking good so far.
He was passed out, face in the toilet, so I just pissed on his head. Serves him right
Randomize
