last night i got mauled by 2 gay men who were trying to make each other jealous by making the other think they could swing back- you're going to love atl
Spotted at kelly concert- 10 year old in a homemade "I do not hook up" t shirt. Well I should certainly hope not, sweetheart.
You know were out to late when I call my hook up at 8:08pm and 8:08am in the same night.
Counseling BFF to break up with her BF. We will get that 3-way
Imagine getting smashed in the dick by a basketball. A basketball made of metal. With spikes. That's pretty much what his dick looked like.
I think god invented us with two hands so we can grab an ass and spank it at the same time.
He called me twice and texted me at 3am. Guess absence makes the dick grow harder.
woke up in the back seat of my car with a naked chick and my brother tapping on the window. yup, what a night
You are the jesus of drinking
You just wait. When you see me foam roll naked, you're going to lose your mind.
Yes be both agreed it was the worst sex in the history of fornication, so I asked him to sign the condom wrapper so I could frame it as a reminder to NEVER sleep with him again
He fucked me so hard my hair extensions fell out
I can't really text bc it's too expensive but I thought youd like to know I just shit myself in a gift shop.
Do you realize our room single-handedly hooked up with most of that wedding party last night?
I had more orgasms than hours of sleep this weekend. I’m going to keep him around a while
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