Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
mrs. f**** your sons in jail, if you can help with bail please respond, if not please dont tell him i told you.
i find it sad that i can no longer sit in the back of class for fear that someone will fart into the heater again.
He could list all of the presidents! Every one, and in order!! I was so impressed the least I could do was give him a blow job.
Ah, yes. Making our founding fathers proud.
ok, just found out the kid i had random sex with in April was on wheel of fortune so i can really no longer say i regret that night
The girl beside me at the laundromat is bitching a guy out on the phone for jizzing on her bedspread. She had to use a triple machine to wash it.
Best oral ever, hands down so to speak. but I'm starting to want to meet that lesbian truck driver he says he's better than. Just for comparison purposes of course.
Getting drunk and falling down, isnt the best way to describe your hobbies, to your new co-workers.
So random question. Does beer act the same as other alcohol disinfectants?
my goal for the rest of college is to escape STD free. fuck getting a job. this is more important.
She told him that she never wanted to see him again then took his takeout box of bacon cheddar fries and got in the uber saying "for feminism"
I may have just sent her dad a picture of my penis. His name's Myron, right?
I passed up getting laid last night. It's almost been a YEAR - what the Hell was I thinking, being so choosy??
I tried to fuck you in my bathroom while my parents were in the next room. I am a clusterfuck of fun.
Can we just take a minute to acknowledge that you're drinking with your gay ex boyfriend's DAD who is a DEACON??
Randomize
