hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
If my boyfriend wants to eat his own jizz after masturbating, what does that make him?
it was like eating out sand paper
We aren't going to mix hockey and sex texts tonight.
I totally agree. all sexting is on hold till after the games over.
Playoffs. This shit is serious.
i'm watching the draft and making cookies. how am i still single?
just heard this guy tell a story about how he got boat head. i want his life
Just watched the couple I sit for and 4 of their friends shotgun beers like college kids. Please let this be us when we get older.
I just smoked my last bit of kief with a grill lighter. This is what crackheads must feel like.
got blackout drunk at the conference and wandered around Minneapolis with a homeless person until one of the other interns found me...I think I'm ready for adulthood.
Uhh dog found a condom. FYI its on the table by couch please dispose of it. No reply Necessary
Threw up in hyvee parking lot. Thanksgiving shopping complete.
I'm hoping the sedatives kick in before I drunkenly decide to eat this whole cheesecake.
I put the area codes from ludacris' "area codes" into our expensive data visualization software at work, it's been a productive day
Why is it pressure? I want to see your cute face and possibly sit on it. You make it like its a bad thing.
When you wanted to give that guy at McDonalds your number you asked the cashier if you could borrow "a pen or just like a straw with his blood on it". He gave you a pen.
Randomize