it was like eating out sand paper
Some chick in the back of my Psychologhy of Addictions class just did a line off her hand. She tried to make it look subtle.
i can't decided whether the fact that her nipples are bigger then her palms is a problem or not
But i guess when you use blowjob as a verb you are entitled to some language allowances
Doing lines of cocaine in the bathroom and the word 'better' do not belong in the same sentence.
He gets a blow job; I get my oil changed free of charge. And that way I only see him every 2500 miles.
Nothing like puking into an empty cooler at a red light on the way to get plan b.
As added birth control I warned him that if he knocked me up tonight I would name the baby Truck.
So my OCD kicked in and I cleaned his kitchen. His roommates were so grateful, they tried to pay me in weed.
YOU ACCEPTED, RIGHT?
Uh yeah. I ate a brick of cheese. Didn't even cut it. We were admiring the teeth marks I was leaving. We decided it was the negative of my mouth
Dont make this weird.... I was wondering if I could paper mache a few of your dildos this weekend?
I feel like we should at least be hungover if we're gonna be this grown up.
Nothing like sunday church bells to aid your walk to the pharmacy to get plan b
It's days like today that make me happy I'm not a porn star.
we didn't have sex though. because i have the will power of an ox.
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