the smoke from my cigarette strangely resembles what patrick swayzes ghost will look like.
no, I didn't make it. Instead, i watched VH1 for... 13 hours? I use the question mark because I was using Flavor Flav's clocks to tell time after the first 3 hours.
so i told him i still liked him. he laughed
well, your crazy. what did you expect?
I have two stamps on my hand....ones from the bar and one is from an aquarium...care to explain?
woke up with the dennys waiters MYSPACE link on the back of my receipt...yep one of those nights
Girl on the bus just slammed her book shut, turned to me and said "I'm way to fucking high to be studying"
You were carrying around a milk crate, randomly putting it down calling out 'praise be to the milk gods' and making people pray to it.
You had one beer and one beer can full of vodka and you took a huge gulp of one of them and called it Emily Roulette
Huh interesting. Well thats too bad. Did he catch on?
I doubt it. After sex he sat there naked until the episode of fresh prince (which had JUST started) was over.
For real, I've been ditched by my boyfriend twice today alone. I fucking shaved for this guy.
Somewhere out there, Gloria Steinem just started to cry.
Is posting a pic on insta of my previously dyed blue pubes socially acceptable?
We were cuddling in his bed and I asked him a question and followed by making a microphone with my hand and told him to speak into it. If he never talks to me again that's probably why.
im glad to be known as "the girl you had sex with on a golf course"
He goes from zero to fucking up in 2.4 drinks. Like the sportscar of bad decision making.
Need to use your shower bro.
FWB wearing glitter again?
It’s like she’s marking her territory
Randomize
