Last night I saw a drag queen take a shot of Red Hot that was soaked into a tampon. I fucking love my life!
the red, white, and blue power rangers were all also in the porn buisness, good bye childhood
just taught 3 girls from korea how to fist pump on chat roulette.
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
after giving each other head, we had a really nice post-oral heart to heart. found out he lost his virginity in a threesome.
We did however see an 87 year old guy die and get resuscitated last night at the bar. He then finished his beer and his game of pool.
Whatever. It was high school. Back then I'd blow anyone who had enough room between their chest and their steering wheel for my head to fit.
Sorry I fell asleep again. I'm in the shower now. Door is unlocked. Condoms are in my desk. I want your game face on for when I get out.
So our 'date' consisted of getting drunk off champagne at four and photo-bombing the shit out of tourist's pictures all over the city. Thoughts?
The fact that he just came out makes his Lent commitment to give up gay sex so much more meaningful now.
Admit it. It's a brilliant plan with hundreds of possible repercutions.
Understatement of the year.
Im at that shitty point in my day where I start planning night activities while finger dipping vyvance off of my desk, you got any plans?
My frontal lobe is being piloted by Jack Daniels right now.
I think getting right with the Lord should involve more than me and a bottle of tequila.
Please tell me im imagining that i claimed that i was king of the ducks.
Randomize
