my grandpa was trying to put butter into the pepsi and i'm like "grandpa what are you doing" and he looks down and goes "well i guess that wouldn't taste good anyway"
Nope changed our mind. Decided your strange bacon like body odor wasn't what we want to smell tonight.
my roommate just said, "don't look at it, just put it iin your mouth"
so she called me drunk and made me stay on the phone with her while she puked.
All i remember was he was wearing billibong pants... well actually my mom found that out for me.
it was like fucking with batman, he had gadgets i never even imagined
oh yeah I know that guy. he's legit. slept in my closet a few times
he threw up in a solo cup, then washed it out and used it to play flip cup. Im not sure if thats resourceful or disgusting.
I spent 10 minutes contemplating condensation on grapes this morning.
I just realized that I have dated 5 unemployed guys...and 3 that drove pt cruisers...Turns out I do have a type.
I give up. I can't handle that class sober any longer. I have an army of whiskey shooters for the next three weeks. Wish me luck.
She wouldnt stop trying to stick her finger in my ass. I wish she wasnt so hot
Omg I literally just wanna sleep with you right now. Like actual sleep. Not sex. Well maybe. But sleep first
I stopped him mid keg stand to show him how cute my bra was...
Anyway, that's been my evening- crying and looking up diabetes symptoms. How was your night?
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