she's basically destroyed all of the faith i had that skinny blond girls could be a functioning part of society.
I am totally the chick from Intervention who barfs up wine and then re-eats it.
The worst part was I wasn't conscious enough to move out of the way, I knew i was being puked on but I couldn't move.
why does he always try to puke into shot glasses
We bonded over the fact that we each, separately, got arrested on the same weekend.
The gay is strong with you! You're more concerned about my outfit than my safety.
Cops are just so fun an beautifuk
I brought him flowers on my way home from cheating on him. Boyfriend of the year award right here.
I found him in his pink and white boxer out side the dorm hall and the only thing he said was "it wouldn't let me in"
On a completely unrelated note I think I have carpal tunnel
Again, totally unrelated
If you were more comfortable around gay men, then you too could get wasted at the gay dance club and go home with hot girls.
i have achieved a new state of being which requires no food or water but is sustained only by coffee and pure, unrelenting rage
I GOT THE PAPER IN AT 11:58
EAT MY ENTIRE ASS COM 101
Had a rough day but my boyfriend made that all better by going down on me while letting me watch Top Gear... I'm buying the engagement ring tomorrow
hey can you come unlock the basement door? I'm trapped in here.
no I can't, you're a safety hazard. but, there's a beer keg down there somewhere. we don't have cups, but help yourself.
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