i was high and broke so i stole a roast chicken and a 40 inch sheet cake from wegmans and ate in a bathroom stall.
2 v-cards in one night. impossible is nothing.
This hotel is not contributing to my sobriety, they have 4 kinds of free wine and beer.
You were hanging upside down on the subway with your feet in the stirrup handle bars. the children were amused.
I just want to see him this morning so I can bask in my wasted accomplishment.
It's nights like those I refer to my life motto: You can't be just friends with someone after you've seen their genitals.
I'm just learned what a rim job is, I feel like crying
I think the last straw was when you put on ice skates to go across the waxed wooden floor.
I cnant read. Cheetos goen. Help. Grt Cheetos.
His girlfriends signaled their approval by pulling me off of him and in turn making out with me. I think I will hang out with this group more often
I found a blow up pig at an adult store. He will have to fuck that on video if he wants anal. Also, I bought a pair of clear high heels. Tell your brother I love him.
Sneezing cum all over the table was not the highlight of the family reunion if that tells you anything
I'd call the fact I ended up in my own bed a huge success
Just imagine a dick squawking like a parrot
wait you like me?? for my personality??
I know I was surprised too
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