HIV tests are more positive than that guy
At least we lost an hour tonight! Less time to make a fool of myself
I'm trying to bond with my sister... Its like getting to know a person I never met that I don't like
you kept making us tell you how cute you looked in your new outfit, even after you threw up all over it
I'don't know who your are but its that time a day. Drunk it up. Did you buy a House for goundhogs days?
DUDE, DID YOU KNOW YOU CAN JUST RENT AN ELEPHANT???
Oh God.
There's a point around the one and a half minute mark where the keg stand goes from impressive to pathetic
Every man needs a table where they can sit and reflect on the successful penile conquests of the day.
Sex obviously provides more sustenance than oatmeal.
I have a tattoo that says Yolo. You should not have been asking my advice in the first place
Sorry 4 always trying to rope you into my sexual exploits
part of it says your brother mayyyy have put his lips on my vagina
I just threw up in front of a bunch of parents/prospective students while they were on a campus tour..awesome..
I've never met a penis that didn't think I was awesome.
I think a major source of concern would be the fact you snorted a shot. Who does that?
Randomize
