When I woke up his cat was sleeping on my face and i had scratch marks on my neck. not happy.
only room for one pussy in that bed.
ice luge is my downfall...
...u mean upfall.
all i know is that they all tuched my pee cup last night.
After I just paid $211 for my hair to be dyed and cut this guy at the bar said "I know you died your hair with koolaid, but I'd still fuck the shit out of you"
Ever since he's come out, my facebook stalking experience has gotten uncomfortable
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
I was talking to some girls while you were falling off your bar stool into the person next to you.
I thought he was joking about the hundred beer challenge until two guys showed up with a camera and boom mic. This cabin party is going to be fucked
i looked up and she was looking over the stall watching me pee and told me to unlock the door. that dedicated to sucking my dick.
Well anything after a French guy would have been a disappointment. But I'm fairly certain he was just trying to masturbate into me.
The pigeons can smell the fear
Wtf
Omg, those nutella cakes are heavenly, like licking the nipples of a muscular black Jesus.
Getting paid in weed to watch a pregnant adult with cooking skills is the TITS
Pooping to opera.
I’m going to bedazzle that dick
What does that even mean
No idea, but I guarantee he’ll get hard every time he remembers it
Randomize