brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
What would Jesus do? ... Jesus would slap a ho.
Ill bet we could have atleast fucked a girl who fucked a guy who has fucked tara reid. That's a famous circle right?
So I realized I'm not completely sober when the automatic toilet flushed and I screamed
since i'm not going, you must continue my tradition of flashing every person there.
I just had to dig under a pile of condoms in my desk drawer to get to a blue book. Summer is officially over.
So i think i'm going to frame my summons tickets and give them to dad as a christmas present...
You were saying you didn't want to go home and insisted that I drop you guys off at your uncles. That's how you ended up sleeping on a porch with two dudes
This is true. I'm still having Jess write "no drugs" on my left hand and "except weed" on my right hand
we were the definition of too high: argued for 10 minutes about who was gonna get the condom (it was 2 feet away on the night stand) and past out watching adventure time.
I just tinder matched with a blue angels pilot. I need to make out with him. For America.
An d I'd rather cry while putting a waffle in my mouth than cry on my pillow, ya feel me?
Here's an unsolicited pic of my tits, because you almost died last night.
It was ok until his mom walked in and asked if he turned on the crock-pot...
Randomize